Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Shadow as Photo

It amazes me that the shadow exposes itself when we are photographed... having pursued my portfolio pix, I was surprised at the portrait shots. I've always shied away from photos - this is reflection of disdaining my obesity - but also a cultural phenomenon. In aboriginal society we've looked at photos as a stealer of soul. Of course modern natives don't believe that literally, but there is (for me) that lingering awareness of how a picture must have seemed to my ancestors... that little part of the Self, stuck on a piece of paper, and carried away by the photographer. So, given our history, photos have represented a time when we lost a little bit of soul.

However, my day was incredible. Bryn Gladding, the photographer, has given me back some of my artist's soul, because without him I would have no photos of my quilts, dolls, and my knitwear. I have never given as much to Bryn as he has given me today. Further to that, I could look at my own reflection on his computer screen and feel a sense of awe. I'm still obese, and more aged than I have seen, but I looked at myself today as if looking upon my visage for the first time. I marvelled that - gee whiz - my impish artist has taken up residence again, and yes, I could see her laughing back at me in my eyes. Bryn helped me find her again. I think shadow is happy, at least for today.

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